Bean is having some bad days at school. I explained the whole color thing before (you know, because we should teach our children that there are good colors and bad colors ... oh, I've figured it out, his teacher is promoting racism with her 1, 2, 3 Magic bullshit ... anyway, tangent) and Bean had TWO yellow days and ONE blue day this week. Umm, that's more bad days than good days. This is NOT my child.
Anyway, I'm starting to feel like Bean is getting a complex. He absolutely knows that if he doesn't have a green day then he was "bad." If you have one bad day during the week, then you don't get a treasure from the treasure chest on Friday. I'm starting to feel like he gets enough grief at school. Unless he does something flat out unacceptable (see: whacking someone unprovoked), then he's not getting punished at home anymore. I think his teacher is possibly a whack job.
I am ::trying:: to hold back opinions. (Do you like how I say that after I call her a whack job?) But I know my kid and anyone who has provided child care of any sort for him has never had a "bad" report about him - seriously, he had one bad day a month last year. (OK, my mom might have a few stories about him pulling some stuff, but she's family - he knows she won't kill him.)
When I ask Bean if he wants to go to school or stay home, he says he wants to stay home. He doesn't cry or whine. He just says it very matter of factly. He says he has fun at school. He mostly talks about recess and lunch.
A friend (she used to work in the neighboring school district) suggested I ask for a meeting with the teacher if Bean has a similar week this coming week. She's obviously sympathetic towards teachers, but she does seem to think that something might be up. So, I think Ill follow that advice.
My neighbor (House of Trees), her little girl is in Bean's class. Said neighbor is doing nothing to help my ::possible:: dislike of Bean's teacher, as she's less than impressed with the school year so far as well. (Her daughter is only having green days, but there are some other concerns.)
I love the guilt that comes with parenting. Have I mentioned this? It's always, Am I doing right by my child? I guess you don't really know till it comes out in years of therapy or you end up on Intervention or something.
9.05.2009
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call Dick Cheney - this school needs to lower its alert level from orange to yellow - 4 year olds are not terrorists.
ReplyDeletehow can u even remember what a "good" color is? What could he possibly be doing to get "bad" colors so often. We had a kid at the preschool I worked at that was future serial killer material(we're talking hurting animals and other kids just to see them cry/bleed). He didn't even have that many bad days a week.
ReplyDeleteI'm sympathetic to teachers, having done this sort of thing. It's just such a bad idea to be using so much negative reinforcement.
I taught for five years--three of them in WFISD, which I know isn't your kid's district, but the people are probably pretty similar. Anyway, if it were me (and it isn't) I'd call the teacher, tell her your concerned about all these "bad" days and ask if you can come spend a day in the classroom. Nothing will give you a better idea of what's going on than that. If she refuses to let you observe, then I'd ask for another teacher. I was always MORE THAN HAPPY to let a parent come see their child live and in person. Only thing I would suggest is to be sure you're out of his line of sight--otherwise he may be tempted to change his behavior for you.
ReplyDeleteAs a final thought, most kids are better in school than they are at home--if this is not the case then I would want to know why.
I guess I am thinking that at this age, unless the kid is really doing something horrible or has just unacceptable behavior ALL day long, why would you give a 4 year old a bad color? Especially more than one time per week? I would think that would wear on their self esteem a bit and that is definitely NOT what you want your child to feel like.
ReplyDeleteI would also call the teacher and ask to come observe what your child is doing to get all these bad colors. Hang in there mama!
I agree with Joe!!! LOL This is only my opinion from my experiences with teachers as colleagues and as a parent, the teachers who use these types of discipline alone--w/o redirection or routines/structure embedded into the classroom experience-- do not know how to deal with the kids. They use "good color, bad color" "smiley face, frown face" for every little tiny thing, because they don't know what else to do. That whole dumb conduct cut crap at that school is a perfect example. You got out of your seat- there's a conduct cut, you asked to go to the bathroom when your passes are all used up- there's a conduct cut, you are talking after finishing your work and even though that's allowed- there's a conduct cut. Seriously, that happened to Thomas at that school. The teacher he had didn't know how to deal with the kids, so threatened/dealt out "conduct cuts" all day. Pretty soon, conduct cuts didn't mean anything and the class was still out of control. He was in trouble every day and did not want to go to school. Changed teachers and never had another problem. Oh yikes. Sorry, off on a tangent. Back to colors.....I also think 1-strike-a-week-and-no-treasure is crap too at that age. Good grief, especially when you're just starting/trying to get used to this all day stuff. I'm with you...teacher is whacked.
ReplyDeletedisclaimer: It would take a book for me to explain every little thing I'm thinking, and I probably sounded pretty jumbled. AND--I love teachers! I am not talking about all teachers. There are some out there who are excellent, good, great, bad, and some that just shouldn't be teaching.
Oh, one more thing...having had Bean over to my house several times unaccompanied by parents, I REALLY don't see him as being a behvior problem in the classroom.